Our conversation on Communication has prompted me to reflect on a topic that I've had brewing in my mind for quite some time. That is, I've been wanting to comment on contemporary language patterns of people my age--that is roughly 18-25 year olds. There is plenty to lament: the dying of the written letter, the dying of basic grammar and spelling ability, the rise of emoticons :angry: (the mcdonaldization of emotive expression), and so on. For this discussion, however, I'd like to key into the idiosyncracies of our spoken word.

Sample overheard discussion:

It grates on my ears. But lest I merely dismiss all of this with my nose in the air, I thought it'd be useful to examine the function of such language. While speaking like this betrays in some sense an inability to articulate one's conscious thoughts, I believe that this type of speech DOES articulate unconscious feelings.

Before we get into it, let me comment that there seem to be two simultaneous trends in this kind of language.
1. Ambiguity--a dulling or blunting of what is really meant. "Like" is the operative word here. Was it "like" the hardest test that was taken? Or was it merely a very difficult test? Does the teacher make you "like" angry? Or does he make you angry? Here, the word "like" serves to dull the effect of what follows after. It is a more powerful statement to say, "He makes me angry," rather than saying "He makes me LIKE angry." Some might say that "like" is a filler, and to that I'd agree. But WHY is it the filler of choice? Why hasn't it always been the filler of choice? 15 years ago, people would just say "ummm." Why like? I propose that "like" is the filler of choice because it not only buys someone enough time to say what they want to say, it always allows a person to express what they want to say WITHOUT REALLY SAYING IT. That is, if I say that Dr. Smith is "like" the worst teacher ever, I'm not ACTUALLY SAYING that he's the worst teacher ever.
Other phrases serve this same function. "Kind of," "almost" and ending the sentence with "ya know?" all do the same thing--they soften the sentence. They seem to indicate peculiar lack of confidence in what is being said, which seems to result in an understating of what is meant.

2. Exaggeration--On the other hand, there is a trend in the opposite direction, that is, things are simultaneously overstated. For example, it's not just that person B feels dumb, they feel like "the dumbest person ever." Words like "so," "totally," and "definitely" reinforce this.

What is it that is being unconsciously articulated here? Why on one hand the ambiguity/understatement, and on the other hand the exaggeration/overstatement? What is this ambivalence all about? Rather, what is it that we are ambivalent about when we speak like this?

I believe that people who speak like this betray the various pressures that they feel when they are speaking. On one hand, they want to be tolerant, respectful, and don't want to draw undo attention to themselves. We don't want to be challenged by what they say, so they say it without REALLY saying it. On the other hand, there is perhaps pressure to stand out, to be entertaining, to be sensational--hence the superlatives. Or, it could be the superlatives function to balance out the ambiguity. The sentence, "he's like a nice person," sounds a bit too weak. Changing it to "he's like the nicest person ever" highlights the "nice" that was previously hidden by the "like."

These are just some random thoughts that I've had on this for a while. Feel free to comment.

Oh, and note the "just" and "random" in the previous sentence. They, too, serve to dull the force of what I'm saying. They serve as a "disclaimer" (as in, don't REALLY take what I have to say seriously, these are JUST some RANDOM thoughts that I've had...)

I'd gotten into a habit of using the word "basically" a lot when I was abroad for a year. A polish friend of mine asked me "what is this basically word you use, what does it mean." And I had a moment of cognative dissonance where I had no idea what to say.

I realized it was a blunter of sorts, much akin to "like" in how I'd used it and explained that to an extent, and then also explained what the word should mean when used correctly.

Would you say that's indicative of modern speech to use these sorts of blunters?

{chuckling} Very entertaining. I liked it very much. Very, very, ever so contrary and merry merrily so enjoyable, ya know?

How much wood would a wood-chuck chuck if a wood-chuck could chuck wood?

And you have to say the following out loud:
"I'd rather have a bottle in front of me than a frontal lobotomy."

And to answer your question Boru.... yes, basically (read and then interpret as "generally").

In a way. I would say actually that these "blunders" are indicative of the modern condition--a state of ambivalence.

Very interesting idea. Thanks for sharing it with us.

I suppose that "eh?" would serve the same purpose in Canadian speech, eh? :P

Haha exactly.

You are spot on.

People should stop pussyfooting around what they want to say and just say it.

Last year, which was my first year in college, I found this to be the case with me. While trust me, I know my grammar is so-so at best online when typing, I have (had) always prided myself on pretty good, at least better than average, grammar when it comes to speech. Which the further south you are, the easier it is.

Anyways, my college campus last year (going to a different campus this year) had a great deal of immigrants. I mean alot, quite possibly a majority of people at the school were either straight from another country or had both parents that were from another country.

But yeah, I found that communication was tough between immigrants and most of the people born and rasied in the US due to what psyc pointed out. Translation of literal speech (especially from someone as sarcastic as me) doesn't often work out as planned.

i use the word "like" in between words all the time. I think my generation seem to exxagerate things alot. thats why i do it.

Probably. Exaggeration has become so mainly stream that the need to qualify almost any statement is there.

When I read the first post for this topic, I cringed... and not just because of the examples of the way we "young-ins" speak these days. I realized that I speak like that sometimes... and it really depressed me. I'll have to take some cues from Delta so I sound like a civilized person! I'd insert a "winking" smiley here... but that would be too much!